It’s so hard to apologize
Over the screaming, blaming, and anger
How can I find the words to say anything meaningful,
When I’m so lost in defending, and why am I defending, and trying to level this thing down
How did we find ourselves drowning
In a sea once a storm of love
The gears change and the car comes to a screeching halt, I’m floating into the dashboard
What is happening, I thought I was safe with you no matter what
How did we come to this
There’s some deflecting and now
You say I’m playing the victim but
Am I a victim of gaslighting
Am I a victim at all
I can’t see anything beyond whatever this is
This zero to sixty emotional highway
Please tell me we can work through this
But am I just wishing on the wrong things
I’m trying to understand thrown words
A simple mistake that turned into something I can’t explain
I’m anything but angry but my guts are turning
And it’s just impossible to find serenity on this highway you control
Swaying in and out of traffic
My life flashing before me and I’m remembering a relationship so similar to this
Am I destined to be in this kind of love
Racing, strenuous, pulsing, frightened of what you’ll do next
I’m struggling to find the will to find some stability
All this yelling is going nowhere
All these words don’t reflect who we are
At zero to sixty I’m no longer sure